Monday, February 11, 2008

It's been awhile.

I'm not quite sure what has been bothering me for the past week or two, but I wish I could snap out of it. Jared keeps asking me what is wrong, but I don't have an answer. I just feel down. I'm sure part of it is the weather. I am ready for warmer weather so that we can enjoy being outside and not trapped in the house all the time. I want to get out and start walking again and get into shape. I think that part of my problem is also the current politics and election process that are going on. My pick for president was Mitt Romney, and while I honestly didn't think that he would be the winner (I personally thought/think that 2012 is a better bet for him), I never really thought that the front runner would be McCain. Now that the field has been narrowed, I'm really not impressed. Can we have a do over in the Republican Party? Pretty Please? Three kids is also starting to catch up with me. I feel like I do not have enough hours in the day to meet each of their individual needs, plus my husbands, and my own personal needs, not to mention keeping up on the house, meals, and laundry, all while working full time. Kylie is learning so much right now in school, and I feel like a horrible parent rushing her through her homework at the last minute, feeling guilty when we don't read every day, and not sitting down and just spending time with her. She begs me to come to her class and help out, but with work that makes it difficult. And when I get stressed with everything that is on my shoulders, I expect too much from her, and snap at her when she doesn't keep up. I've also tried to start working out again, and night after night I am mad at myself for not finding time to exercise, or I do a quick couple of minutes that really don't count for much. I was really hoping to lose 5 lbs before Vegas in two weeks and I'm frustrated that I can't even manage that. Another thing that I think is bothering me is that I have started reading my scriptures again (see my chart on the right to see how my progress is) and any time I push towards the right direction spritually, the devil pushes with all his might in the other direction. The passing of the prophet, while a wonderful event for him, has also caused a somber mood. He became the prophet while I was in Jr. High and during those very important seminary/high school years, he was my prophet. His presence and personality will be missed. I am not trying to be negative, but maybe by listing these things it will help me recognize what I need to do to cheer up! The past week and a half have been busy ones so I'll try to update everyone on our lives. On Friday, the 1st, Jared's dad went in for surgery on his neck. As soon as Jared received the call that his dad was out of surgery and okay I could just sense his relief. It was a bit scary since they were cutting a hole in the front of his neck to go in and fuse some of the bones together. Hopefully this will relieve him from some of the pain he has lived with for the past several years. The next morning, as we did our taxes, President Hickley had his funeral, and we got a phone call that our Niece Kayla was born a couple of weeks early. We went up to Ogden that evening to visit her and her parents, Jacob and Mindy.

Brynlie and her newest cousin, Kayla
Baby Kayla. She was very awake and alert when we came for our visit
Sadie woke up just in time for us to leave.
Kylie loves little babies!
Sunday was Stake Conference, which meant no church. I'm sure Mom and Dad are reading this and shaking their heads, saying this is not how I was raised. And that's okay, you are better parents than us because NO WAY were we going to sit through two hours with these three girls! Speaking of church, yesterday I decided to let Brynlie try out the sacrament water for the first time. Bad idea. The moment that water was gone she started screaming. She was MAD that I took it away from her. I had to get up and take her out because she was not going to calm down until she got something else to drink, which meant a trip to the mother's room. Earlier in the week Vince and Meagan came over to help install the blinds that we bought from her brother Jason and his wife Jan. (How many Jason's is that you ask? Her brother Jason, Sasha's husband Jason, Jared's brother Jason, and his son, also named Jason. NO MORE JASONS!!) They were so nice to come over and install them, without us even asking, since Jan and Jason live in Vernal. And the blinds are wonderful. If anyone is in need of some blinds I can point you in their direction! Some of you may be wondering why I feel the need to blog about something as trivial as blinds... After two and a half years of showing the neighbors more than they asked to see it is exciting to have that glass next to the front door finally covered. Saturday was Kylie's big dance day. She was dancing at the pre-game show for the Utah Jazz. The evening deserves it's own post so I will blog all about it tomorrow (and let me tell you, it isn't pretty. Just ask Jason and Sasha.) I do want to mention that while I have been so ornery these past couple of weeks Jared has tried very hard to be patient with me and has tried very hard to make me happy. One day he called and told me that that night we would have a housecleaning party that night when he got home to help me catch up on our messy house. He even took some cash out of the safe one night and told me to go shopping (without any kids!!) and buy something for myself. Thank you Jared! I love you! Oh, I just thought of another reason for my bad mood. Sadie left a barely eaten fudgsicle on our coffetable that melted all over the middle of our living room floor. For those of you who know me well, you know that that alone could put me in a bad mood for a week!!

5 comments:

Annie said...

I agree. We need a do over. I think a lot of people have been feeling the same way. How did we get to this point? How did we end up with a guy like McCain as our [almost] nominee?

Kayla is really cute. She makes Brynlie look huge!

Kristin. said...

Well good for Jarad, taking all three punks by himself and allowing you to take some time to yourself! I personally know how hard it is!!!
I'm all sorts of curious as to what you bought yourself?!

kristin.

PS Chuck is pretty excited to babysit the little children. Hopefully they are just as excited!!!

Babzanne Barker said...

Dear sweet Aspen! You made me laugh out loud. It's almost midnight and I told myself I wasn't writing any comments on blogs tonight, just reading as many as I could. But I want you to know that your openness and honesty about life doesn't sound negative at all. It was more like you were thinking out loud and I bet all of us reading it could say "Hey, that sounds like me" to at least part of it. Love you lots!! (And your darling family, too.)PS You need another baby though. A boy. You could name him Jason.

Diana said...

I loved this post! It made me feel like I'm not the only one. I can totally relate to the whole homework and reading thing. Some times I feel like the worst mom! I hope that you have a fun relaxing break in Vegas!

PS As I was typing this I remembered that we havn't mailed the stickers yet. I will do that tomorrow. =)

Linda said...

As we were waiting to board the plane to Jamaica, we saw Mitt Romney's news conference announcing he was pulling out of the race. My first thought was a hope that he would be MaCain's running mate. We'll see.
I hope George is feeling better by now, and that the operation did what it was supposed to.
Only one more week to Las Vegas.